Adoption and the Religious Community

this link is a post one of our readers (Kathleen) made on the Attachment Disorder Support Group board re: FamilyLife.com's "Hope for Orphans" ministry.

I actually had come across this last night and her point is a good one. She is responding to this statement "Adopted children probably have many emotional issues I won't know how to handle." In reading that, we as adoptive parents would conclude that there is nothing to argue about in that statment. Except that it is one of their "Myths of Adoption." Kathleen goes on to point out that an adoption ministry should not only recruit people to adopt, but should also support parents after they have adopted.

I have heard way too many horror stories about the way that adoptive families are treated by the religious community. Obviously, as a pastor's wife and someone who has probably in 43 years missed less than 20 Sundays in church, our family has had a lot of exposure to the religious community. And we have received a great deal of support. But we have heard of many people who have stopped going to church because there is so much criticism and lack of understanding and they simply no longer fit in.

For some reason, it seems to be the goal of many individuals to discredit parents when their children misbehave or do not fit into the mold. It gets very tiring to have people constantly watching your every move to determine why your kids are doing what they do. Or there is the 'I don't know WHY you say this delightful child has special needs", suggesting that we are too critical of them because they save their rages for home.

Continuous educating gets tiresome for us as parents, but it's something we must do. Thanks to Kathleen for doing so and sharing her efforts with us.